Gaga lovers, be warned.
First off, can I just say her name is SO dumb? It still bothers me.
Second of all, this new song and video are pure shit. Dog shit. Horse shit. Whale shit that's sunk to the deepest recesses of the Marianas Trench. Bloody terrible.
Okay, so the song. Hooray for being bold and daring and making a political statement and standing up for what you believe in, awesome. Voicing opinions, yay, I'm all for it. But the song just sucks. It's obnoxious and as has been pointed out by a million people already, it's a total rip off. Really, Gaga? You pride yourself on being so original and bold and daring and unlike anyone else, so you copy off of someone who was that first? I mean, kinda cool to pay homage to a great, but also completely hypocritical to do so through your art--to call it your own and profit off of it? Low. I'm not for that.
Andddd the video. I woke up this morning to a newsfeed FLOODED with this video. Everyone was posting it, everyone was gushing over it. I watched it, of course, out of curiosity and the hopes that she'd redeem herself, this song, and her reputation.
I couldn't have been more wrong.
IT WAS AWFUL. From even more blatant thefts from Madonna to the now boring structure of every other one of her videos to the uncomfortable images and birthings to the stupid story she made up to open, every ounce of it was terrible.
I will give the video ONE compliment, and only one. The ONE thing I was slightly impressed with in this video is the illusion of her body in that glass box at the beginning. That tripped me up more than once and actually was an effective illusion, so yay for that. But now get ready for me to rant about how much I loathed the rest of it:
Regarding thefts: The title for the post is a link to an article that calls her out quite nicely.
Regarding the structure: WHY CAN'T SHE DO ANYTHING NEW. EVERY one of her videos has been group dancing, her naked, people groping her, close ups of her motionless and emotionless face in some other artsy/avante garde set up, and an unnecessarily long story surrounding it. Not all the videos have stories this bad, though. This one was exceptional.
Regarding the story: Again, way too long. Also, way too STUPID. The story was just hokey and cheesy. Mother Monster, two lands of love and hate--could you be any more predictable? UGH. And the skeleton makeup? That didn't fit in at all. Not that any of it fit in at all with anything else--the song OR the rest of the video--but that was so pointless. And there wasn't even any dancing with the male model. You just looked creepy near him. Awkward, dumb, terrible.
Regarding the imagery: NO NEED FOR SO MANY VAGINAS. Or the kaleidoscope effect. Did you intend to give me a headache within the first two minutes of your story? And women shoving their hands up your vag and massaging whatever secretions were coming out all over your legs? Just disgusting! Not to mention, ripping an automatic rifle out of there? Ew. Ewwww ew ew. And a unicorn to open it up? Really? Not to mention the MJ bit--you are not MJ. That was not paying homage to him, that was nothing and it was stupid to include and MJ is a god. Don't desecrate him. Same with Hitchcock--why would you sample music from "Vertigo?" Ugh, stop taking other people's shit!
Regarding HER image: Stephanie, you're supposed to be bold. People have worshiped you for being daring and out there. On your boldest song yet (albeit terrible), your song with the biggest and strongest message, your song that isn't just "Oh my gosh, I'm so drunk, I can't find my keys! Forget it, let's dance!", you totally let down with the video. You really needed to push the envelope, be BIG and courageous and audacious! You gave us weird, pointless safety. A video that made me physically uncomfortable to watch and gave me a headache at its onset. A video that made me more angry than anything. After such an underwhelming Grammy performance, I just assumed you were saving it all for this so you'd really blow us all out of the water. But you were a complete and total let-down.
I know Gaga isn't reading this, but allow me to continue on as if she is: I'm not even that big of a fan of yours, but I know you have incredible talent and you're wasting in on shit songs--honestly, all I want from you is to sit behind a piano and belt out something beautiful and powerful. I don't care about being big and flashy and crazy, but if you put out a song like that, you can't be mediocre. You have to be simple and compelling or big and astounding. You obviously wanted this song to be big and astounding, but you dropped the ball in every way. Sorry, kid.
Disappointed,
The Amplified Shadowed Side
First off, can I just say her name is SO dumb? It still bothers me.
Second of all, this new song and video are pure shit. Dog shit. Horse shit. Whale shit that's sunk to the deepest recesses of the Marianas Trench. Bloody terrible.
Okay, so the song. Hooray for being bold and daring and making a political statement and standing up for what you believe in, awesome. Voicing opinions, yay, I'm all for it. But the song just sucks. It's obnoxious and as has been pointed out by a million people already, it's a total rip off. Really, Gaga? You pride yourself on being so original and bold and daring and unlike anyone else, so you copy off of someone who was that first? I mean, kinda cool to pay homage to a great, but also completely hypocritical to do so through your art--to call it your own and profit off of it? Low. I'm not for that.
Andddd the video. I woke up this morning to a newsfeed FLOODED with this video. Everyone was posting it, everyone was gushing over it. I watched it, of course, out of curiosity and the hopes that she'd redeem herself, this song, and her reputation.
I couldn't have been more wrong.
IT WAS AWFUL. From even more blatant thefts from Madonna to the now boring structure of every other one of her videos to the uncomfortable images and birthings to the stupid story she made up to open, every ounce of it was terrible.
I will give the video ONE compliment, and only one. The ONE thing I was slightly impressed with in this video is the illusion of her body in that glass box at the beginning. That tripped me up more than once and actually was an effective illusion, so yay for that. But now get ready for me to rant about how much I loathed the rest of it:
Regarding thefts: The title for the post is a link to an article that calls her out quite nicely.
Regarding the structure: WHY CAN'T SHE DO ANYTHING NEW. EVERY one of her videos has been group dancing, her naked, people groping her, close ups of her motionless and emotionless face in some other artsy/avante garde set up, and an unnecessarily long story surrounding it. Not all the videos have stories this bad, though. This one was exceptional.
Regarding the story: Again, way too long. Also, way too STUPID. The story was just hokey and cheesy. Mother Monster, two lands of love and hate--could you be any more predictable? UGH. And the skeleton makeup? That didn't fit in at all. Not that any of it fit in at all with anything else--the song OR the rest of the video--but that was so pointless. And there wasn't even any dancing with the male model. You just looked creepy near him. Awkward, dumb, terrible.
Regarding the imagery: NO NEED FOR SO MANY VAGINAS. Or the kaleidoscope effect. Did you intend to give me a headache within the first two minutes of your story? And women shoving their hands up your vag and massaging whatever secretions were coming out all over your legs? Just disgusting! Not to mention, ripping an automatic rifle out of there? Ew. Ewwww ew ew. And a unicorn to open it up? Really? Not to mention the MJ bit--you are not MJ. That was not paying homage to him, that was nothing and it was stupid to include and MJ is a god. Don't desecrate him. Same with Hitchcock--why would you sample music from "Vertigo?" Ugh, stop taking other people's shit!
Regarding HER image: Stephanie, you're supposed to be bold. People have worshiped you for being daring and out there. On your boldest song yet (albeit terrible), your song with the biggest and strongest message, your song that isn't just "Oh my gosh, I'm so drunk, I can't find my keys! Forget it, let's dance!", you totally let down with the video. You really needed to push the envelope, be BIG and courageous and audacious! You gave us weird, pointless safety. A video that made me physically uncomfortable to watch and gave me a headache at its onset. A video that made me more angry than anything. After such an underwhelming Grammy performance, I just assumed you were saving it all for this so you'd really blow us all out of the water. But you were a complete and total let-down.
I know Gaga isn't reading this, but allow me to continue on as if she is: I'm not even that big of a fan of yours, but I know you have incredible talent and you're wasting in on shit songs--honestly, all I want from you is to sit behind a piano and belt out something beautiful and powerful. I don't care about being big and flashy and crazy, but if you put out a song like that, you can't be mediocre. You have to be simple and compelling or big and astounding. You obviously wanted this song to be big and astounding, but you dropped the ball in every way. Sorry, kid.
Disappointed,
The Amplified Shadowed Side
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