Future Plans

BLARGH I'm sorry it's been a week.  The past seven days have been extremely hectic, but I've been itching to just write again.  So now that I finally have the chance, let's get to it!

I went out to lunch with Zero and GoldenEye yesterday--we have a little tradition of grabbing some pizza between classes on Wednesdays.  The week before, I was unable to go with them so I had asked about what it was I'd missed.  Then, they exploded.

They explained their plan.  They have a plan that maps out the entire rest of their lives--they're to go into business together after they attend the same graduate school, formulating their mega-corporation the whole time while they are near and freshly educated.  Their corporation will do "everything.  Literally, everything."  It will have thousands of employees and hundreds of branches; it will be the biggest thing to hit America.  And every Wednesday, they would take all their interns out to lunch for pizza and discuss business, the future, politics, economics, etc.  They were formulating traditions for their futures, mapping out their lives, placing themselves years away with a crystal clear image.  It was wishful thinking and high hoping, but they knew exactly what they wanted and they were ready to go get it.

It hit me right then.  This is life, and it's coming at me way faster than I want to accept.  I don't have that clear picture, I don't have a direct path I intend to take.  I have no post-graduate plans.  The extent of my life is in school, and that's all I've got.  And I can't tell if I love that or hate that!  LIFE is so close... this is it.  This is the final stretch.  Everything is the final stretch... and there's never any stopping and going back.  Ever.  Life carries on.  It can end in an instant, it can last forever.  It can end up the exact opposite of how you always imagined, it can go exactly how you want it to.  It can take a million unpredicted turns, it can be mapped out any which way in the garden of forking paths.  But Life is facing me head on.  Whether I'm curled up in a ball or running at full-speed, Life is straight ahead.  Life is staring me down.

It's kind of terrifying.  It's kind of exhilarating, too.

This is a little spacey and a little out there--it doesn't really make logical sense.  It's just a stream of consciousness because I have a lot of difficulty channeling these thoughts and feelings.  So, I'm sorry about that.  But hey, it's what's on my mind!

"Contemplate" by TheSophiaPark (http://thesophiapark.deviantart.com/)

Rambling,
The A.S.S.

Dance it Out!

I'm in a bit of a phase.  Be it that I've had a good day, I don't have time to run to the gym, I'm too stressed and need an outlet, or I just need to stop studying and take a break to refresh my mind, I've been dancing a lot this week.  I'll blast Jet's "Are You Gonna Be My Girl?" or the Kanye's "Monster," maybe some Beyonce, the classic "You Make My Dreams" by Hall and Oates or Cee-Lo's "Fuck You" and just rock out.  Like, ROCK out.  And it's so liberating!  It's SUCH a good feeling and I highly, highly recommend doing so.  I know I'm not unique in this idea, I know millions of people do this, but I honestly can't explain how good it feels to just dance it out.  In the rare chance that you really want to do it right now, do it!  Maybe not at work, but as soon as you get home.  Let it out.  There's plentyyyyy of good music to rock out to--just pick your favorite and go at it.

"Rock out" by Citruspers (http://citruspers.deviantart.com/gallery/?offset=120#/d2jbkf4)

ROCK OUT,
The A.S.S.

Hot Chocolate Streets

My last post was about how lovely Thanksgiving is--what a nice, pleasant, gracious, inflective, personal holiday it is.  This post, unfortunately, will be about how terrible Christmas is.  SORRY IN ADVANCE, hate me all you want, but Christmas makes me feel down right despicable.

Thanksgiving 2010

It was a quiet Thanksgiving.  We slept in, had some bagels and coffee, flipped through the channels, and never changed out of our sweatpants.  No extended family came, we never left the house, we didn't cook laboriously for endless hours, we kept it much more low-key than usual this time around.  And I was okay with it.  An hour or so after dinner, we put on a movie and tossed in some popcorn--we were feeling adventurous.

I adore Thanksgiving.  I think it is a beautiful holiday, including of everyone (when looking past the genocide aspect and focusing solely on the notion of being thankful), and a time that truly calls for some inflection.

A Spectrum-Spanning Mental Concoction

I'm in the weirdest mood imaginable.  There literally is no word to describe it--it's the biggest, oddest amalgamation of emotions, a concoction that veritably spans the spectrum.  I don't know what I'm feeling and I don't know how to handle it.  How to react to it.  My mind is literally so jumbled that I can't think.  I really can't.

There's denial, despair, rage, ecstatic elation, love, romance, hope, promise, inspiration, excitement, anxiety, anticipation, frustration, confusion, unrest, envy, sorrow, mourning, comfort, safety, cliffhangers, relaxation, ACK!  All swirling and tumbling around my mind--what the hell am I supposed to call that?  What kind of state is this!

Well, it sucks pretty badly.  I won't lie.  I wish I could tell you all the events that transpired and instigated these emotions, but they're incredibly specific and I rely on this anonymity so much as I write.  So I'm telling you how I'm feeling, even though I can't.

So if you see a girl whose face is saying nothing at all--or perhaps everything at once--it might just be me.



...what am I?
The A.S.S.

MIDTERM (Election) MADNESS

REPUBLICANS TOOK SEATS IN THE MIDTERM BAHHHHH THIS COUNTRY IS SO STUPID AND IRRESPONSIBLE AND IMPATIENT BLAHHH WHY ARE CITIZENS TURNING BACK TO THE SAME PARTY THAT RUINED EVERYTHING EVERRRR GAHHHH THE CONSERVATIVES ARE GOING TO SHIT ALL OVER US ALL RAHHH THE UNITED STATES IS FALLING APARTTTTT AHHHHHHHH.

Holy hell, guys.  Calm the fuck down.